Horoscopes Are A Drag™

Honey, "Horoscopes Are A Drag" on QVegas is your go-to for that sparkle of cosmic tea, served hot and fabulous, straight from the stars with a glittering twist. Each week, we're spilling the celestial secrets for every zodiac sign, so you can strut your stuff with the stars aligning just right. It's astrology with sass, glam, and a dash of drag magic, making your cosmic journey as dazzling as a drag queen's wardrobe. For your weekly dose of star-studded advice, click your heels and head over every week, darling!

aries

Honey, gather 'round and let me sprinkle some fabulousness on your day! Picture this: You're strutting down life's runway, draped in shimmering sequins and radiating confidence. Each step screams, "Y'all wish you could be this fierce!" The universe is your stage, and you're the star. Challenges? Child, they're nothing but stepping stones, honey! So, pop that glitter, work those heels, and remember: life's too short not to sparkle and shine brighter than a disco ball!

taurus

Darling, listen up because Mama Taurus has got the fabulous forecast you need! This week is all about channeling your inner diva and shaking things up with style and grace. Strut into new opportunities and let your natural charm work its magic, honey. Relationships may sizzle with a touch of drama, so keep those heels high and your standards higher. Remember, you are the queen of your own universe. Werk it, glamour-puss!

gemini

Honey, gather 'round and let me spill the tea in all its fabulous glory! Life’s a stage and you're the headliner this week, shining brighter than a disco ball at a Saturday night cabaret. Hold onto your wigs because it's all about serving up your truth with glam and glitter. Honey, trust those instincts, shake off the haters, and sashay towards the spotlight. Darlings, it’s your moment to werk, twirl, and show the world who reigns supreme!

cancer

Honey, gather 'round and let Mama dish out some fabulousness! Picture this: you're strutting to your throne, leaving a trail of glitter and joy everywhere you go. You've got charisma, uniqueness, nerve, and talent shining brighter than a disco ball under the spotlight. Embrace your inner diva, let that personality sparkle, and remember, darling, you're a queen who's here to turn heads. So put on those heels, paint that face, and conquer the world with that fierce fabulosity!

leo

"Honey, let me tell you! This week, Leo, you're the dazzling disco ball in the center of the dance floor. Your charisma is lighting up the room like a sequined gown in a spotlight, hunty! Strut your stuff and work that fierce confidence, because opportunities are gonna be lining up like admirers at your feet. Just remember, darling, to spread those glorious rays of yours evenly—don’t burn anyone with that fierce fire, alright? Own it, Leo!"

virgo

Honey, let me tell you, life is a fabulous runway, and you better strut your stuff! Keep those heels high and your confidence even higher. Whether you're serving sass or feeling fierce, always remember that you're here to shine brighter than a disco ball, darling. Drama will come, but you've got enough sparkle to outshine any shade. So, pucker up, buttercup, and face the world with all the charisma, uniqueness, nerve, and talent you've got!

libra

Oh honey, gather 'round and let me sprinkle some glittery wisdom on ya! Now, this week is all about finding that dazzling balance, and as a Libra, you’ll be shimmying to the rhythm of harmony like a queen on the catwalk! You're gonna charm the sequins off everyone you meet, so spread those fabulous vibes far and wide. And darling, don't forget to strut your stuff with confidence because the universe is your runway! 💃✨

scorpio

Honey, grab your wigs and heels, 'cause I'm about to serve you a fabulous rewrite, darling! Picture it: under the dazzling spotlight, I'm giving you 75 words of pure sizzle and sass. Imagine every sentence strutting down the runway, glittering with charisma. So buckle up, kittens, as this drag diva reimagines those words with a splash of glam, a dash of drama, and all the pizzazz you can handle. Trust me, you'll be gagging for more! 💅✨

sagittarius

Hey there, darlings! Gather 'round as I sprinkle a little fabulousness into your day. Imagine a world where your heels are sky-high, your lipstick is fierce, and the spotlight is forever shining on you. You're strutting down life's runway with confidence, honey, and ain't nobody gonna steal your shine. So, hold your head high, swing those hips, and remember, you're a queen who can conquer anything with a wink and a sassy flick of your hair!

capricorn

"Alright, darlings, gather 'round and let this glamorous queen spill the sequined tea! Picture me on the main stage, serving you a dazzling dose of delight. Life is a runway, honey, and this week is all about strutting your fabulous stuff like you own it. Embrace those cosmic energies, let your inner superstar shine, and don’t let anyone dull your sparkle. Remember, darling, the world is your audience, and you are the headlining diva!"

aquarius

"Darling, let me paint you a picture as colorful as my fabulous wardrobe! Life’s runway is calling, so strut with glitter and flair. Challenges? Honey, they’re just sequins in our hot mess of a gown. Sip that confidence cocktail and twirl through any shade life throws at you. Remember, baby, you’re not just a star; you’re the whole galaxy! Now, go out there and slay, because the world could use a little more of your razzle-dazzle!"

pisces

Oh honey, let me spill the tea with all the glam and glitz you can handle! Darling, picture this: strutting down the runway in six-inch stilettos, dripping in sequins, while the spotlight’s loving every inch of your fabulous self! You’re serving charisma, uniqueness, nerve, and talent, hunty! Celebrate your fierce individuality with a wink and a swish, because nobody can work it like you do, baby. Keep serving those looks and living that fierce fantasy!